This morning I was woken up fully into the present moment by a Song Sparrow landing on my right hip.
I was already awake, resting in bed and noticing the waning moon in between the two fir trees to the south of our deck, when this sparrow decided that my duvet made a good perch.
She sat on my hip for a few moments…
…and feeling her there I didn’t dare even turn my head for fear of scaring her away.
So I stayed still and she hopped over to my partner’s back where I caught a perfect glimpse of her hopping around, her lovely fine feathers and her sweet little brown eyes looking around and deciding where next to go.
Truly blessed I know we are ~ to be living this life where we can sleep outside, surrounded by trees and birds with only the sky for a roof.
To have a roof we can take shelter under when the rains come that is beautiful and healthy and spacious enough…
And just to have enough.
Enough food, enough clean water, enough resources to provide an education for my son that gives him the skills and aptitude I know he’ll need for the world he will enter into that is, at this point, more or less falling apart at the seams in every direction we look.
To have an amazing partner who loves and cherishes me.
To have my health – (though there are parts that ache when they get too cold for too long or if I don’t do my yoga practice), for the most part I get to experience a pain-free and relatively amazingly healthy body.
To have enough joy.
All these things ~ miracles really.
None of these things I take for granted, because I’ve lived through times when I haven’t had any of them.
Because, like you perhaps, there has been so many times I have had to turn to just the simple fact that I could breathe, and be grateful for that.
I look around and I see many who still don’t have this – this simplicity – just to have ENOUGH.
Or just to have health or a pain-free body/mind.
Maybe that is even you, my dear reader.
Because to have enough seems simple – and yet on this planet at this time, it is particularly rare.
Cultivating gratitude is one practice that seems to always bring more enoughness, and even awe….into my life.
If you feel like sharing and being witnessed in what you are grateful for today, please leave a comment below! This is SUCH a powerful practice to share.
So.
It’s been a little while since you’ve heard from me ~ and that’s not only because I’ve been busy counting my blessings. I’ve actually been deeply immersed in learning, growing, and being Mom to my 10 year old wild boy.
On Vulnerability:
And, as you may know if you follow me on Facebook, I’m currently working with a new (and amazing!) mentor through her year long Relational Somatic Psychotherapy Program, which involves 5 week-long experiential learning intensives plus another week personal growth retreat.
We just went through our second week-long intensive with a focus on shock trauma.
For me it wasn’t a lot of new information as I’ve studied Peter Levine’s (Somatic Experiencing) work fairly extensively, but to actually be in experiential learning mode DEFINITELY brought me through the eye of the needle into deeper awareness (and release) of my own ….well…shit.
Which is really how, as therapists, we learn (I think) (ideally) to guide our clients…since you can’t really guide someone where you haven’t been.
At least, that’s what I think.
It was beautiful, hard, deep, wide, excruciating at times AND worth every moment.
I’m so grateful for this work and how it calls me deeper and further into who I AM.
And I’m so grateful for my amazing, courageous clients who give me the gift of supporting them through their own (sometimes) excruciating and (often) tender places and into the deep, wide, expansive beauty that is our lives reclaimed from trauma.
When we heal ourselves/our cells it travels … ripples…and dances … (I believe) seven generations back and seven forward.
It is WORTH IT.
Thus, why I’ve been in deep integration mode most of this month.
ON INTEGRATION:
I really believe that we can heal anything when we can bring to it deep presence.
Trauma, pain, confusion – all of it is naturally…trying…or perhaps the word is willing…to unwind itself.
Just as sure as gravity keeps our feet on the ground, our natural state is health/well-being/integration and when given the right support, (which is mostly, again, just deep compassionate presence) we will naturally move towards just that.
And yet deep presence can be challenging to cultivate when you are being “mommed” at [“Mom, where’s my socks?” “Mom, I’m hungry but I don’t want any of the 17 different things you’re offering me to eat….” “Mom…. (you get the point)]…
Or life is pulling you in 17 different directions at once.
We somehow must find the moments though.
Even if it’s sitting – just sitting in simple, open awareness – for five minutes before we start our day and five minutes before we lay our head down to sleep.
Just this one practice has, at times, and I know this for sure beyond a doubt, been absolutely pivotal in changing my life.
Just this one practice has, at times, and I know this for sure beyond a doubt, been absolutely pivotal in changing my life.
In allowing me to see clearly enough what the next step is.
In making just that little bit more space that let’s me to respond rather than react to what happens throughout my day.
In giving me the power to choose something different.
In giving me the power to choose something different.
THis is a wonderful practice, AND you don’t need to do this specific practice in order to have these kind of results, it’s just one that I really highly recommend.
But any daily practice that brings you into your body, your center and non-judgemental awareness of what is can have these kind of results.
For you perhaps it is sitting for an hour. Or maybe just 2 minutes.
Or maybe you need to dance.
Whatever it is, I invite you to make July the month you commit to practicing ~ commit to yourself ~ daily ~ and see what happens!
For you, my dear reader, I’m so grateful to you for joining me on this journey of learning, healing and growth.
I’m currently working on a gift for you – I’m creating a short guided meditation which should be ready to release towards the end of the summer.
In the meantime I’m about to dive into co-facilitating our annual “Awakening Joy” women’s retreat with Elizabeth Claire Burr on Hornby Island this coming weekend and then into seven days with my Relational Somatic Psychotherapy Mentor on the Sunshine Coast, so I’ll be off-grid for a while and then probably integrating for a bit after that, plus it’s SUMMER so I won’t be online regularly again until September as I’ll also be taking some time to go camping and explore some mountain meadows and wild west coast beaches…(so blessed)…
^That’s my new organic natural fibre west coast style yoga mat ^, lol I love summer!!!
Know that I’m thinking of you my dear ones ~
& I’ll be writing and making videos here and there so definitely stay tuned and if you haven’t already make sure you’re in our Wild Women Soul Tribe Facebook Group as you can follow me there as well.
Thank you for staying with me ~ and mostly thank you for waking up this morning, for continuing to be a positive light in a world with so much difficulty and darkness.
Know that just you being you ~ and being present ~ brings just a little more light and love into this world.
In love, light & Raven feathers,
Josea Tamira Crossley
